One of my friends and mentors mentioned to me that there would be some bumps in the road. Well, today, I hit one of those bumps both mentally and physically.
Today has been a flood of feelings starting with a morning where I wholeheartedly felt really good about where I am. Even though I coach the importance of stress reduction, I had never truly taken the time to take a catalog of my life stress. I realized the overwhelming relief that taking time to take care of myself brings. The relief in knowing that I can wear regular clothes again... Like, shorts with a button or a wrap dress!! That is really a bigger stress reliever than I thought!! The amazing sense of calm that having time to study and grow my skill set has also been massive for me.
Then for some reason, something shifted in the afternoon and I felt an overwhelming sense of guilt and doubt. I have NEVER been in a place where I 100% cannot help around the house, care for the kids and help them enjoy their summer, or contribute to diffusing “kid situations”. This is the first time as a mom that I can say that I have not been able to be there. There is doubt attached to that guilt because I chose to move forward with this surgery because I wanted to feel better both functionally and aesthetically. Although I am posting my journey with a movement progression and nutrition... There is a whole other side to this picture!!
Today I also had A LOT of pain around the incision point, nausea, and incredible fatigue. I just feel very out of sorts. I believe this day is what my mentor was referring to when she said... You will have “bumps” in the road.
Ok, so if it is a bump... I can either sit on one side of the bump and wait until someone lifts me over it. Or, I can figure out how to lift myself over it. Usually, when I am tired, experiencing discomfort, or having any type of feeling... I just hammer through until it goes away. But, I don’t have that option, now I have to let myself feel the feelings, recognize they are there, and then move forward. I cannot go backward and take this surgery back... Not that I want to.
One way for me to process these feelings is to write this blog. Another way to read an inspirational story online. And, finally, I just studied a lot today and focused on all that I am getting accomplished during this downtime.
For the pain and fatigue, I am taking movement breaks every 45 minutes with a 5-minute walk around the house and 3 movement strategies to reduce the pain.
I am not sure yet what tomorrow will bring... But until that happens... I will go ahead and move over this bump in the road!